02 May 2007

on the verge.

my baby boy is on the verge of so many things.

he's almost sitting up by himself (really only needs me a little bit, to catch him when he thinks he can stand up)
almost rolling over by himself (from back to tummy; he's done it a few times but i think they were accidents)
almost crawling ("almost" might be too generous...but he does scoot himself to where he wants to go) and so many other things.

i get excited to see him learning and developing but i get sad as well because my baby boy won't be such a baby so much sooner than i'd like. all these "firsts" makes me think about the "lasts". we focus so much on "the first time"...

the first time he rolled over
the first time he had real food
the first time he laughed out loud...
but what about the lasts?

i can't remember the last time he slept on my chest...and i miss that. what about the last time he needs me to rock him before he goes down for a nap? will i know it's the last time? will i remember it? makes me want to cherish every moment with him even more because i know that the bigger he gets, the less he'll need me. and while that's a good thing...it's also a sad thing for me. and it makes me more aware of every single giggle and coo and cuddle. because i know they'll come to an end far too soon...

one last i won't miss? the last time i have to make the trek to his room to feed him in the middle of the night...

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